Tag Archives: right to life of michigan

Perspective Is A Tricky Thing

Posted on by

Perspective is a tricky thing. What you see or hear is only sometimes the whole of something. There is a saying that people who are dancing are considered crazy by people who cannot hear the music. In other words, there are layers of information necessary for communication. When they don’t match up, things go sideways. Add to this that everyone transmits and receives information through filters. These filters affect perspective. Some are easier than others to discern. A person who says, with a kindly smile, “I love you” communicates something far different than another person using the exact words while rolling their eyes. But you only know this from the perspective of sight. A text or email can hide it. If it weren’t for the intuitive clues inherent to tone, a phone call could potentially conceal it, too.

In the end, when perspectives differ in ways resulting in conflict, one-on-one conversation is always best. Admittedly, when face-to-face interaction is not possible, a phone call is the next best thing. Allow me to show you how this is true.

I received an early morning email last week from Amber Roseboom, the president of Right to Life of Michigan. It pinged on my phone just as I was putting my coat on to leave for a visitation. Pausing for a moment to skim the first few lines, I could see she was somewhat unhappy with me. With that, I read the message thoroughly. I won’t go into the email’s finer details. Just know that I took my coat off, sat back down at my desk, and called her. We talked for quite some time.

To start, she was surprised that I called so quickly. Nevertheless, my immediate return call and her willingness to put aside what she may have been working on fostered a shared perspective that the other person’s concerns mattered to us.

Amber began the discussion. I listened. In short, an eNews message I wrote in October was making its rounds. In it, I expressed specific concerns for the newest advertising and online commercial campaign effort (“Life: The Other Choice”) from RTL of Michigan. Amber read the eNews message and, as she mentioned both in her note and on the phone, felt somewhat betrayed. The betrayal was two-fold.

First, she believed the message was harmful to an organization I’d proven myself so incredibly devoted to for so long. Indeed, I have been and remain devoted to RTL of Michigan. Plenty know I’ve gone to the furthest reaches in Michigan to iterate life’s message at rallies, conferences, or evening dinners, only to drive hours through the night to get home in time for my usual church and school duties the following day. I’ve done this countless times, often resulting in maximum exhaustion. But I do it because life is important to me.

Second, and perhaps more intimately, Amber was saddened that I didn’t express my concerns to her first.

For the record, I did not broach either of these first concerns directly. In context, they seemed rhetorical. My fidelity to the cause needs no defense. Beyond that, had I defended the appropriateness of a public response to a public campaign, Amber and I would’ve likely ended up in some rabbit holes that didn’t lead to what we both already knew was true: We were not opponents. We were teammates with different perspectives who, having already proven ready to preserve the comradery, were willing to explore those perspectives and adjust our thinking if necessary. So, instead of a defense, I continued listening. She continued to explain the rationale behind the campaign.

Initially, I interjected on occasion where appropriate. For example, I made a passing comment that doing anything for public consumption, whether writing or creating commercials, is risky. I didn’t take the time to explain the comment, but what I meant was that we both know the external dangers we face out there. I get my share of hate mail, as I’m sure Amber does, too.  Beyond that, what we do is risky internally, too. Sometimes, the team doesn’t agree. In this particular situation, we were experiencing the downside of the internal risk.

I also recall saying that I don’t remember half of what I write, especially when it comes to my eNews messages. I write them on the fly. Whatever comes out of my nine-volt brain is what ends up on my computer screen, most often with minimal editing. Of course, I pray before the first finger hits the keyboard, asking that my words would be faithful. That said, I actually had to search for what I wrote. I found it, took a moment to skim it, and found I remained comfortable with what I’d written. We went on from there.

Along the way, we more than cemented our collegiality. We acknowledged the importance of maintaining creedal boundaries, especially for the sake of protecting organizational identity. We discussed the cruciality of shaping the culture rather than allowing the culture to shape us. Together, we agreed that RTL of Michigan must remain immovably fixed to its North Star—life—and that no room can be given to anyone or anything that would distract from life’s heading. In tandem, we confessed a common faith in Christ, one that desires faithfulness to Him as we search for the best ways to bring the message of life into a world fostering death as a viable choice during pregnancy. That angle of discussion led us to momentary examinations of our Lord’s ways of bringing His listeners from point A to point B. It led us to consider the way Saint Paul interacted with people he met along the way of his ministry. It led us to these and more. By the time we were done, we had landed at a fundamental realization, which I had already mentioned.

We are not opponents. We are teammates with different perspectives. However, these perspectives turned out to be similar after all. They were just in a different order and being considered with varying prominence. I did my best to frame it for both of us.

Essentially, I’m an incrementalist. I’ve learned that very rarely can anyone be carried from one perspective to another without taking a whole lot of deliberate steps in between. Yes, my goal is always a touchdown. However, a touchdown is rarely available at kickoff. Most often, plays are needed to get the ball down the field. I work that way in pretty much everything I do. That said, the forward motion happens within absolutist boundaries. A football game occurs on a field and is governed by rules. The steps I’m willing to take—the things I will or will not do or say, the plays I’m willing to make during the game—are influenced by absolutist principles. Relative to these two perspectives, my October eNews focused more so on the absolutist nature of the effort—the language I believe we must use, the North Star heading, what protects the organization’s position relative to culture and objective truth—rather than the incrementalism involved in the plays themselves. I did make it plain that any play resulting in lost yardage is a foolish one. But beyond that, the absolutist position—the boundaries—was my precise perspective. If we don’t hold the line on certain things, the game is lost before it even begins. Amber was reading what I wrote from a purely incrementalist perspective, and as such, she felt that one RTL of Michigan’s worthwhile plays was being misjudged.

In the end, we realized we did not disagree on much of anything. Instead, our opposing perspectives were, as I already said, just differing measures of emphasis applied to different aspects of the work. Perhaps best of all, we understood one another better, and as a result, we rejoiced in continued fellowship. In fact, I told her I’d write something saying as much. You’re reading it right now.

Amber Roseboom and Right to Life of Michigan have my full support.

Also, I asked Amber if she’d be willing to speak at Our Savior’s upcoming event with Seth Gruber on January 30, 2025. I thought it would be an opportunity for anyone in the RTL community who may be thinking we’re opponents to see us together on stage as friends—because we are. Serving alongside one another would provide this far better perspective.

In closing, I think there’s a lesson to be learned.

W.B. Yeats once wrote, “The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” In a way, he’s talking about untapped perspectives. As it relates to what I’ve shared, I think the key to sharpening perspectives is being humble enough to listen and patient enough to process what we hear in a way that doesn’t lose sight of the goal. It’s both incremental and absolutist. That said, the key to this hangs on the hook of bravery. Unless we’re daring enough to reconcile while at the same time being willing to search our own thinking for error, there’s no chance of seeing through to something better. But when we take the time to do this, blessings emerge. Perspectives can shift, relationships are strengthened, unique skills each player brings to the game come into sharper focus, and efforts toward the goal line endure.

I think that happened. I’m pretty sure Amber believes it happened, too. And so, we go forward. We know the boundaries. We see the goal line. We understand the fundamentals. With the playbook in hand, we’ve come to execute. We take the field, grab the ball, and move it relentlessly down the field as a team, no matter how the world might try to stop us.

Amber and I are in it. Are you?

Burning the Candle at Both Ends

Posted on by

Birthdays are something, aren’t they? Some have gravity that others do not. Our daughter, Evelyn, turned thirteen at the beginning of October. Going from twelve to thirteen is a big deal for a young person. The teenage years have a prospective orbit that the previous years did not. I turned fifty last Wednesday. That felt a little like making a jump into lightspeed and arriving at a completely different solar system altogether. I still feel like I’m in my twenties. Jennifer tells me I sometimes act like it.

Well, whatever. Sometimes a guy just has to dress like a stormtrooper before going to Walmart. It’s the way of things for someone who, for a good part of his life, has been unwilling to let the world around him do the steering—a guy who has an inkling of how bright-eyed an exhausted mom and her two kids can become after crossing paths with a Star Wars character in the cereal aisle.

I like that. And while they can’t see my face, they know I’m smiling, too.

I suppose any birthday brings an opportunity for introspection. Certainly, the older I get, the more I reflect. I’m guessing you do, too. I had one online friend, someone who cares, reminding me to slow down—to make the most of the days, reminding me not to burn the candle at both ends. He knows me well.

Interestingly, he used the phrase, “burn the candle at both ends.”

Do you know where that saying comes from? It’s from a poem by Edna St. Vincent Millay. How do I know this? Because she died on my birthday. At some point, I remember learning she died back in 1950 on October 19. I don’t recall how I became aware of it; probably one of those radio segments talking about events in history. One of Millay’s claims to poetry fame was the lyric entitled “First Fig.” In it, she wrote:

My candle burns at both ends; It will not last the night; But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends—It gives a lovely light!

Millay had a Dickinson way about her—crisp and melodic with her words, all arranged in the best order and bearing something profound. Even this little verse speaks volumes.

For one, it reminds the reader of life’s transience. No matter the pace at which one’s candle wax is consumed, each day will end, as will the candle keeping the evening vigil. Interestingly, while her words are typically used to describe being overworked, that’s not necessarily her intention. In a simple sense, she means to say that she has a life and intends to do the most she can with it. She already knows she won’t live forever. Still, she plans for her light to burn as brightly as possible, producing a lovely light before both friend and foe.

I suppose birthdays are fertile moments to ask pragmatically, “Will any among us last the entirety of life’s night?” If the one asking the question is honest, his or her answer will be no. As the day ends, so will the night. And so, the lesson here? Give your utmost diligence to each of the clock’s ticks. Life is progressing. Its wax is being consumed. Live accordingly before your candle’s flame goes out.

This reminds me of something the Lord said to His onlooking disciples in John 9. It’s not exactly the same image, but it is somewhat similar. Before stopping and healing a blind beggar, the Lord said to His disciples, “We must work the works of him who sent me while it is day; night is coming, when no one can work.” (v. 4).

Firstly, I think it’s interesting that Jesus used the word “we” instead of “I” when describing who would be involved in accomplishing the works of the Father in this world. It’s not as though God can’t do these things Himself—as if He actually needs any help. The Lord is also not saying that anyone will have any active part in the work required for salvation. Jesus will accomplish all of that. He will live perfectly under the Law. He will suffer and die for the sins of the world. He will rise again as Victor over sin, death, and Satan. On the other side of these things, He uses “we” to show He is including His disciples in the efforts of faithfulness born from His work. His disciples are believers, people recreated by the Lord’s sacrifice. Believers produce the fruits of faith, often taking the form of both witness and service. They are vessels—carriages—sent out to extend the message of what Jesus has done. They do this by both word and deed. In short, they live out the Gospel in the world around them in recognizable ways.

Admittedly, the Christian life is often passively unaware. In other words, faith so often creates fruits in us we don’t even realize are being produced (Matthew 25:37-40). On the other hand, the Christian life is actively aware, too (Matthew 24:45-46; 25:29; Luke 10:25-37; 1 Peter 3:15; James 2:18-19, 26). It stands at attention. It’s ready and willing to engage in service when required. Jesus demonstrates this by stopping and taking time to heal the blind man. He could have passed by. He certainly had other cosmic-scale things to do. Still, He stopped. He helped. Sometimes, Christianity requires that we stop and help.

I suppose, secondly, the fact that Jesus crams this Christological point into the image of a single day implies not only the urgency and determination He has for situating His Christians in the world in this way but also the divine stamina He knows we’ll need for suiting up and doing what needs to be done. Life is busy. It’s often experienced in a flurry. I can confirm this, and it’s likely you can, too. Therefore, the Lord reminds His listeners in the very next verse that so long as He is present—and He has promised He will be—we’ll have access to a light that empowers our labors (John 9:5). Even when darkness falls, He will be the fuel that keeps the flame burning at both ends, giving a lovely light through us to both friend and foe.

Knowing these things changes the trajectory of our earthly orbits in some pretty incredible ways. We know we can’t earn our way to heaven, but we also know we can’t sit idly by when a blind man needs our help, or a wearied mother in the cereal aisle could benefit from some cheer, or an unborn child needs an advocate for life. If we are not burning the candle at both ends—ever vigilant in our awareness and willingness to embrace each moment for faithfulness to Christ—we’re living a dimly lit life.

Lots of folks around the world receive this eNews each Sunday morning. The ones in Michigan know where I must go next.

Proposal 3, a ballot proposition that will enshrine abortion (and other atrocities) in the Michigan Constitution, is on the verge of passing. Barbara Listing, the president of Right to Life of Michigan, mentioned a few nights ago that other executive leaders for Right to Life in surrounding states are saying Proposal 3 can’t be defeated. They’re urging that Right to Life of Michigan change course, that we give up on fighting the proposal and begin putting all the coffer’s coins toward the campaign needs of pro-life candidates. In other words, the onlookers have already consigned Michigan to the title “Unrestricted Abortion Capital of the World.” But Barbara told her wobbly counterparts she wasn’t going to give up. She’s going to continue leaning into the fight, giving it everything she’s got. She’s going to burn her candle at both ends. I’m with her. I’m going to burn my candle this way, too. I will continue to do everything I can to see Proposal 3 defeated. I have a life, and here at this particular moment on the timeline, an opportunity to live that life to its brightest has appeared. Regardless of the outcome, I will light both wicks and burn my candle. I’m not going to live forever. And so, I will do everything I can with every breath I’m given to act—to stop and help the unborn who cannot help themselves. I’m going to fight for the preservation of parental consent laws, for religious objection laws, and for all the other Godly things Proposal 3 is designed to erase with a single solitary dot on a ballot’s page.

You need to be engaged against this devilry, too. You must vote “no” on Proposal 3, and on the same ballot, you should choose candidates who are committed to doing the same. To do otherwise is to be in contradiction with one’s own Christian identity, thereby living a dimly lit life. Now is not the time to be dimly lit. Let friends and foes alike see your flame of faith. It will be harder for some than others. Still, as a Christian, it’s a must. Let the flame of your faith beam brightly, burning at both ends, and with an unapproachable heat. Let it be a beacon in the darkness to those who would find it, and I dare say, let it be a forewarning of your resolve to those in opposition who’d dare try snuffing it out.